Thursday, October 16, 2008

Keeping options open.

After hemming and hawing and talking to my mom, I've decided to reapply to a few MFA programs. This DOES NOT mean I'm necessarily throwing in the towel, but I'm currently unsure if I chose the correct program for me, and I'm not loving what I'm doing, nor am I feeling particularly inspired or helped by what I'm doing. So, I finally decided the smartest thing for me to do would be to reapply to a few programs, so that come the end of the year, I can decide for myself if I am unhappy enough where I am to switch, or if things have looked up and I now want to stay.

Yeah. I don't know. I hate "giving up", so I'd rather avoid the situation if possible, but my mother made a good point in that a graduate degree in a creative field is a big deal - if I don't feel like I'm getting what I wanted out of the degree, then there really is no point in wasting my time. So I'm not going to make a choice now. But it's good to keep my options open.

Ugh, I just hate having to do more apps though.

As for the novel, I have 30 pages right now. I got over my last hump of writer's block. I am not writing as much as I should every day... it's been hard to get myself into the right mood, and I rarely leave my apartment if I don't have class or tutoring to do, and I miss my Starbucks in Union Square and my Hispanic bakery in Jersey. There's no place like that near here. But, I love writing this novel because I've imposed no borders on it, and it's like this work of exploration for me. I'm hoping to get a full draft out by end of next summer. But we'll see.

1 drops:

Cap'n Miffy said...

yea, you're not giving up !!! you're keeping your options open -- even if you get into the other programs you'll have a decent amt of time to decide whether you want to stay in SD :) plus, we all know you hate driving, hahaha ^_~

but i'll support you no matter what happens. i'll even ride with you in the highway. o_o...

p.s. hah, c---s would never let me shave half of his face! the way that he bets he always makes sure that he has a 90% of winning.

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