I wrote 3000 words of my new project the other day, and that helped ease some of the anxiety I feel. I do have to keep things in perspective and remember that at the end of the day, I'm here for one reason and one reason only - I want to write.
I oscillate between starting to feel like I have a grip on things, and feeling like I've still made the worst decision to come out here. But I suppose it doesn't matter that much when I write. Writing makes loneliness go away, unsuredness, change. In my own world, I am comfortable; in discovering my characters, I have friends; in moving along plot, I have purpose.
Maybe that's the point. With three years of no social life, theoretically, you can get a lot of writing done.
I have three years to finish and polish a novel. That's the goal, right? Come out with a finished product to pedal to agents. See my name on a spine before I turn 35.
That's the plan. That's the perspective I keep having to have. This is what I came here for. Time. And time is what I need to make, time is what I need to have.